I can summarize the first year of being a parent in one word: change.
My body changed, my sleep schedule changed, how I dressed and ate and breathed and blinked changed. How I socialized and walked and viewed TV episodes all changed. At times I ate change for breakfast like it was a chocolate donut. So tasty and such a treat. Other times I fought change. The kind of fight two neighborhood cats would have: funny and scary, but mostly over-the-top annoying and no one other than me cared about the fight.
Change is a fact. It’s going to happen. It’s a symptom of being alive. Like aging, it’s going to happen.
We are living in a hyper-fitness, hyper-fix-it, hyper-cover-it-up or tuck-it-in, or nip-it, or lift-it, or transfer-it-somewhere-else society. Most of it is to get back to where we were, during a time when we felt our best or thought we looked our best. What if we ignore what we used to be, and chase after what we can become?
In the fairly common scenario that your body, mind, time schedule, and career, went through the change of welcoming a baby, then change is as close to you as your boobs. We know boobs need to be supported, although that usually feels uncomfortable and if you’re like me you want it to be appropriate to go out in public without support. Change needs support. It needs your support. Don’t let it hang for too long, otherwise that too will get uncomfortable.
Here are a few ways to support change:
- Admit it’s happening to you.
- Decide to identify what areas of your life have changed.
- Make a plan to harness those areas of change and drive them toward the new you.
- Find similar people who are doing the things you see yourself doing then ask them to support your goals. In short: be authentic with yourself and others.
The ability to change and age is the greatest gift we have, as humans. You have the gift to progress through life and to redefine yourself in each season of life. I’m not who I was in my 20’s, and my kid doesn’t know it, but he’s thankful for that fact. My boobs aren’t the same either, and that’s because they kept a kid alive for the first year of his life. Therefore, they need different support because they went through a lot of changes. I’m okay with that. Sometimes I have to ignore society’s ridiculous expectations, because it doesn’t support the change I am choosing to support in my life.
You, my friend, are worth the change that aging brings with it. Look into the mirror and smile at where you are choosing to go as you grow, because eventually you’ll be smiling at the new you.